Lets Make Fall Great Again

Day 33:

Another dreary, rainy day here. Perfect for snuggling and recovering from travel, busy weekend, and a golf tournament. I did take a quick trip out to walk around Michael’s because I was contemplating putting together a gallery wall, got quickly overwhelmed, and instead snagged 70% off Thanksgiving stuff. Let’s talk about this for a second, it’s not even Halloween- how is the Thanksgiving stuff already on clearance!? As a society, I feel we have a hard time living in the moment and want to also celebrate three months of Christmas. I find Christmas stressful with all the events, presents, and expectations and want to enjoy the fall- dangit! I was incredibly excited to find that I was going to have my maternity leave during my favorite season of the year. Unfortunately, I didn’t know that we picked up a 5th season- Rain! Due to the rain and flooding we’ve had to cancel our annual fall camping trip. I want  cool temps ( without rain) and all things orange and pumpkin.

Positive Thought of the Day: Pumpkin Spice Latte. No other explanation required.

 

Golfing For a Cause

Day 32:

Well, I can say that my golf game has returned to my pre-pregnancy state: not very good. Happy to report that I played 18 pain free holes (rocking some maternity pants, no less) and we used several of my shots (thank goodness for scramble formats). I am hoping to get in a few lessons before returning to work because I want to spend more of 2019 playing golf.

Positive Thought of the Day: Glad to see many people out there playing in support of breast cancer research.

Voting

Day 31:

This one is going to be short and sweet as I’m still in recovery from activity last week and also a busy weekend of social activity. The introvert in me will be recharging all week.

If I can stand in line for an hour while breastfeeding my baby to exercise the right to vote, then so can  you. Nothing gets me more fired up than when people complain but choose not to be a part of the solution. I choose to be a part of change.

Positive Thought of the Day: Women have the right to vote, and that is an equality that is not awarded to everyone. Let us exercise the power we have by voting, women ( or all humans) of America!

Halfway There

Day 30:

Today makes the halfway point of my maternity leave and two Fridays in a row of lunch dates with strong, fellow boss moms ( and also where baby slept the entire time). Today, we celebrated a boss VP who is having a baby via a surrogate. She is a strong woman and one who inspires me to get out there and continue to propel my career without compromising myself. Excited to see her take on a new challenge of motherhood, and perhaps be able to support her on a new part of her journey.

Positive Thought of the Day: Finding friends where you least expect it. Our colleague introduced us today as friends and I haven’t really thought much about how many friends I’ve been able to find at work.  To this day, I am still close to many people I started my career with, hired or help hire, or now even work alongside or for me. When you spend many of your waking hours with people, it’s nice to be able to call some of them friends.

Work Travel Part 2

Day 28- 29:

I traveled for work this past week for a meeting of all the leaders in my company. Yes, I voluntarily chose to take time away from my newborn and participate in an executive level meeting that was good for my career. There are many who may judge me for this, and I even second guessed myself once or twice. Many have asked- and yes, I believe it was worth it.

First, as I mentioned before my support system is incredible and I had zero concerns with leaving baby with my husband. On a side note, it was amazing to me how many men asked me or just assumed that it was “grandma” watching the baby. Don’t forget I am married to a boss dad, too! My two biggest concerns in preparation for this meeting were the health of myself and baby ( in which case I would have cancelled) and his ability to take a bottle ( which has been a non-issue), so I went into the meeting with zero qualms about the baby.

Almost halfway through maternity leave, I felt like I was experiencing some brain atrophy from lack of use of my dura matter. The meeting jumpstarted my brain a bit and got my neurons firing again. Selfishly, it was a good awakening of my almost dormant career thoughts during my leave as much of the networking involved conversations about future roles, career, and overall company direction. I believe attending the meeting allowed others to see me as a strong and committed (I mean, I did attend while after just having a baby, via C-section no less) and gave me a peak into executive leadership at my company which was a great learning experience.

Yes, I missed snuggling baby and having our special time together, so I ate/drank those feelings with room service and a few drinks at the hotel bar. Joking aside, the meeting also gave me a new appreciation for the time left with baby and I will continue to make the most of it while I can as I have plenty of time to work when I return.

Positive Thought of the Day: Direct flights that minimize my time away from the family. These are few and far between for us, so it was nice to only have to spend one night away from the family but be in meetings for two days.

Post Baby Work Travel

Day 26 & 27: ( Okay, now I’m cheating a little.. but its getting harder to keep up as baby stays awake longer and I am more active).

As a somewhat frequent traveler for work, I have perfected the art of minimalist packing ( carry-on only of course) and have only once had to Amazon Prime underwear to my hotel. You have to love modern day inventions. Packing for a work trip while pumping requires several additional items and careful wardrobe consideration:

Pump: For the breastfeeding mom, critical to keep up supply. Bag also doubled as my ‘purse’ where I threw in my wallet, chargers, notebook, and kindle. See minimalist traveler statement above. Although the pump is a medical device and doesn’t count as a carry-on, because I had a C-section I wanted to minimize items I had to physically carry.

Bottles, storage bags, cooler: To bring back milk. Careful calculation of how many bottles and bags to bring is important.

Easy access clothes for pumping: After a fashion show with an audience of one baby, I chose two dresses- one with buttons on top and one was made of a stretchy material. Blazer and sweaters for layering in case I got milk on my clothes and needed to cover it up.

Copies of TSA pump and breastmilk guidelines: Just in case. Type A and consummate worrier here.

Nipple Pads: Cannot spring a leak while having business conversations.

Hair straightener: Because after five weeks mostly in yoga pants or no pants at all, you want to look good for your work debut!

It took me a lot longer to pack than I care to admit because this mom was out of practice! I was so focused on making sure I didn’t forget any of the above that I completely forgot a jacket for STL in October- guess I’m not such a great planner after all!

Positive Thought of the Day:  My amazing family who will help watch the baby so I can attend my work meeting.

Golf

Day 25:

I was supposed to play in our annual fun play golf tournament tomorrow, but ended up bailing once I realized even though you can be cleared for exercise around six weeks, a full 18 holes of golf just isn’t wise. A few weeks ago I googled- “how long after a C-section can you play golf” and the results were disappointing. The hits I received were all about MEN playing golf after their wives C-sections and no results on my actual query. Don’t get me wrong, I am no Michelle Wie.. I just wanted to get in a few rounds before going back to work but it made me want to share some of my experiences with golf.

I wish I started earlier.  I should have listened to my dad (are you following, Dad?), but being a moody teenager I wanted to do the exact opposite of what my parents recommended. I did dabble a little bit in high school and college, but had I kept up with it I would be a much better player today.

Be vocal about wanting to play. Let people know you play and would like to join in on leagues or tournaments. Once I started making it known that I played, I started to get more invitations. Many are VPs of my company and the thing is- I’m not good at all. I am just sure to not slow people down and try and play with people of the same philosophy- fun and friendly competition.

Stop worrying about people judging you ( unless you are a really slow player,  in which case I am totally judging you- I don’t have time for that and your shot isn’t getting that much better with all your practice swings). I used to not want to golf because I didn’t want coworkers to see me in a vulnerable state and I used to get really nervous about golfing with people in higher positions. But you know what, as much as you are worried about your game, they are just as worried about theirs. This is just a good rule in life, own your game and worry about you.

And my personal favorite ( anything that can allow me to effectively multi-task):

Golfing means less office work and more exercise. Who doesn’t want that? I tend to only want to golf during the week, and not on weekends because weekends are primarily family time. Making golf a part of business, means I can multi-task- get work done, get out of the office which is always good,  often catch up with friends, and have the added bonus of health benefits. Win-win-win!

Positive Thought of the Day: I am playing in a fundraising golf tournament at the end of this month and very much looking to enjoying my favorite Texas season and getting in a bit of a workout. Also, Spring Break vacay is booked !

 

Confidence

Day 24:

23 days in and I finally missed a day of writing. Exhaustion from all day cluster feeding, dreary weather, and not getting out of the house got to me. But after a fussy day, baby slept well and I was energized for day 24! I felt confident today, starting the day with a lunch with a friend. It was a cool fall day and we sat outside on the patio while Baby slept the entire time (this requires impeccable timing and self- imposed stress to ensure that baby will be fed, clean, and sleepy for the drive to the restaurant) so that I could enjoy a nice adult lunch conversation with another fellow boss mama. Relationships with other people in similar stages in life are so important. I always love lunch dates with this boss mama because she is so relatable and supportive. We both embrace that working mom life can be messy, but are always are striving to do better. This working mom also got a  call from the assistant principal (your heart always skips a beat when the school or daycare number pops up, amirite?) to tell her that her son redirected a negative discussion into a positive one and I got to share her proud mama moment with her.

After lunch, running some quick errands, a surprise chat with our Chief Diversity Officer who is also a working mom- I was feeling accomplished, confident, like I could do anything. So, I braved taking all three kids out on my own- my daughter was performing at a halftime high school football game as part of a fun clinic she participated in. Again, I calculated precise timing of when I needed to feed baby, pick up the girls from school, make sure I found all the necessary items from the clinic almost a month ago ( where the hell was that hairbow?).  It was all going swimmingly. We were early, baby was comfortably snuggled in his carrier that I was wearing, and all three kids were in good moods. What kind of alternate universe was this? Until I felt it… something warm was on my belly and seeping down my pants. It was a diaper explosion and it wasn’t minor. Nothing like a poop incident to crush your confidence. What I’ve learned from having two kids is that you have to learn to roll with the punches, so I sat there for the game in my poo stained jeans and confidently cheered on my eldest girl on a nice fall evening.

Positive Thought of the Day: Today is the International Day of the Girl. Its mission is “to help galvanize worldwide enthusiasm for goals to better girls’ lives, providing an opportunity for them to show leadership and reach their full potential.”  I firmly believe it’s important for young girls to believe in themselves and be confident in their own skin, and have the confidence to become our future leaders. I am grateful that my children have extremely positive and incredibly strong female role models in their lives and hope this will foster strength in them to be good and do good.

Life Lessons

Day 22:

When we have one parent night out over the weekend, I  like to balance that with some special family time. This past weekend we also visited a non-profit rescue ranch. This place not only rescues abandoned and neglected animals, they rehabilitate them to be special needs pets. In a mutually beneficial relationship, these rescued animals love on humans with special needs and vice versa. What started as just a family outing turned into some major life lessons on kindness, inclusion, and even death.

We got to visit with bunnies, turkeys, pigs, cats, kittens, dogs, ponies, and one sick calf. Each animal has a story to tell and the rescue encourages you to get to know the animals and their stories. I was admittedly a little nervous when the girls wanted to get into the cages with pitbulls, but they were really the sweetest dogs ever- perhaps a reminder that kindness matters . #2 always talks about becoming a vet one day, so this was also a neat outing to talk about caring for all animals. The next day, we learned that the sick calf didn’t make it through the night which made the girls really sad, and reflective on the fragility of life. I learned some things about dairy farmers- I didn’t know, apparently some dairy farms breed cows to increase milk production of their stock and then abandon the calves. For local friends, I recommend a visit to Safe In Austin.

Positive Thought of the Day: Encouraged that there are kind people in the world, and that they open their homes to show the world their kindness.

Night Out

Day 21:

Over the weekend, we had our first non-family babysitter watch our three kids ( and two of my cousin’s kids too) so that we could attend an induction ceremony for my mom to a board for Asian  American Networks in  Austin. Third kid (and one that doesn’t mind bottles) makes going out a lot less stressful, not to mention that we have a handful of trustworthy babysitters from years of daycare. The thought of having one person watch 5 kids may seem insane, but there is a concept that I dub ‘The Synergy of Extra Kids’ that makes it work like some sort of magic. This is where having extra kids around to play with your own kids actually makes it easier on the parent or caregiver. The kids entertain each other and you don’t hear the dreaded “mooom” or “daaaad” call every two seconds. This works most optimally at ages 4 and up.

It was a neat ceremony, with many elected city officials in attendance. My mom not only was inducted as a board member, she was also the event planner of the evening.  Our table of family was very proud to support my mom and her extensive service on non-profit boards. Surrounded by all sorts of working men and women that dedicate their time to non-profits always has the effect of making me feel like I am not doing enough, but then I have to remind myself that I have littles at home and that I do participate when I can. There is also something to be said about knowing your limits and ability for commitment that we have to be able to acknowledge and embrace. Discretionary time is valuable and we must choose wisely where we spend it, and for now my commitment to philanthropic causes and boards must be strictly limited to one-time, commitment free opportunities. Pro tip: Attend non-profit, philanthropic events and call it date night to get more bang for your buck. = )

Positive Thought of the Day: Grateful for a friend that utilized the “Synergy of Extra Kids” to entertain her kids and provide some respite for us on this rainy day . It can be hard to find friends willing to take your kiddos and whose kids your kids love to hang out with and you actually love too! Win!